October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month and I wanted to share with you issues that you need to be aware of in your relationships.
What is Relationship Abuse?
Relationship abuse is a pattern of abusive and coercive behaviors used to maintain power and control over a former or current intimate partner. Abuse can be emotional, financial, sexual or physical and can include threats, isolation, and intimidation.
I have been given the opportunity to speak with women about their experiences with abuse once they have left an abusive relationship. Many still suffer in silence afraid of reporting the incident to the police or even to seek couselling.
I wrote my debut novella Walk Quiet Run Quick (Amazon) a contemporary romance written to educate and to promote awareness of domestic abuse. Not only to be read by women but to men and young adults.
Domestic Abuse Is Only Physical. Right?
Wrong. Abuse can take several forms –
to name a few.
Domestic Abuse Only Happens To Certain People.
No. Domestic Abuse does not discriminate. It can happen to anyone.
- 1 in 4 women suffer from abuse in England & Wales
- 2 women are killed every week
- Globally 1 in 3 women will experience abuse at the hand of their partner
- Men are also victims of abuse
- People in same sex relationships
In my book Valencia, my protagonist finds herself in a situation she never thought would happen to her. Will she be persuaded to stay by her partner or will she manage to escape her new reality of being controlled?
He Only Hit Me Once.
If you are in a new relationship and your partner has been violent and or abusive towards you for the first time, more often than not they will apologise for their behaviour promising never to do it again. However, this illustration shows the Cycle of Violence
This violence will continue for as long as you stay.
In my novella, why was didn’t Valencia leave?
Because Jac had all the power and control. He constantly made coercive and threatening towards her which made her feel that she had to stay no matter what. He abused her physically so she felt ashamed.
He abused her physically so she felt ashamed.
He appeared to others as a charming handsome guy who would believe that he was capable of abuse?
He consistently promised that he wouldn’t hurt her again.
He told her that he loved her. By appearing apologetic about his actions, Valencia believed he would not hurt her again.
So, these are some of the warning signs to be aware of if you feel that you are in an abusive relationship.
If you feel that you may be in a situation much like Valencia, don’t suffer in silence. Reach out and talk to a friend or family member. Or contact ~
I am a People Whisperer – I Hold Space for a conversation with you. So if you would like to talk to me over coffee, not necessary on the subject of abuse but on any other subject that you feel you want to discuss but have no-one to talk it through with, then you can contact here.
So until next time know that you are brave, courageous, beautiful and awesome.
Have a Fabulous day. xx